Author: Gray (85 Articles)

Just a standard geek who gets a kick out of all things nerdy. When I'm not making weird stuff for the web I'm either gaming or complaining.

It was mid afternoon, cars were going from point A to point B faster than point C could ask them what all the fuss was about. People ran back and forth across streets carrying black briefcases full of processed trees and loud noises filled the air with confusion. Ted and Sam huddled into the corner of a large brick building while plotting their devious plan to steal them enough food to last them for days.

“Alright Ted, all you have to do is jump into the middle of the road and start dancing, just dance like you’ve never danced before.”

“That should be easy, I’ve never danced before. Should I sing? I’ve never sang before, I’d really like to sing.” Ted was getting very excited now, which worried Sam, but he kept on with the plan anyways.

“Sure, sing all you want. Just stay in the street singing and dancing. While you’re doing that, I’m going to grab as many wieners from that hot dog stand as I can take. Once I’m clear, meet me at the park on North Street. If this works, and it will, we shall be kings!”

“I’ve always wanted to be a wiener king, a singing dancing wiener king! I’d tell all my friends, but I don’t think I have any, that’s something else I’ve always wanted. Once we’re kings, I can have everything I’ve always wanted! Oh let’s go now, I can’t contain myself anymore!”

Ted proceeded to relieve himself, as the latter was a literal statement, and then flung himself onto the street and started dancing. He was very pleased at the shuffling of his little feet, and then began to sing the intro music from Jurassic Park, but since that had no lyrics, he wasn’t singing very well.

Sam wasted no time and charged the hot dog stand while everybody was distracted at the mysterious sight of Sam dancing in the street, singing to non existent lyrics, which is what confused and distracted the people most.

He was able to quickly grab five wieners, which was more than enough and took off faster than donuts fleeing the scene of a policeman’s retirement party. He was ecstatic, his plan worked and he’d have food for days to share with his dancing brother. But he quickly realized that he could not keep his balance with five wieners and quickly lost control of himself, ending with a near fatal crash landing into the side of a young girl’s head.

Hours later, Sam woke up with complete amnesia while covered in little bits of wieners. He even forgot the fact that he was a pigeon and believed he was a mentally challenged zebra from Africa, which led to an odd life of eating grass and chasing after dogs. Little is known what happened to Sam the Mentally Challenged Zebra Pigeon, but his brother Ted (who later became a cross dressing bag of chips) knows he made the best of his life and hopefully stayed away from other zebras.